True Story

"My eye just farted"

-

  • Rachel: ok im going to sleep but i had to share this before i forgot so i pulled myself out from under my mountain of various pillows and stuff to type this out. don't let me forget to share this with the world some how perferably tomorrow when im not half asleep
  • Rachel: there's liquid glue like from a bottle, theres solid glue like a glue stick, so isn't the glue of the future gaseous glue?
  • Rachel: like you put stuff like paper shreddings or glitter something messy in a container with it and itll cover that stuff and the fast moving and spread out gaseous particles with form a coating around it but it wont stick to stuff unless you press it onto it and let it sit, returning it to a solid, or liquid then solid, state. No mess gasseous glue of the future.
  • Rachel: Bam.
  • Rachel: now to find out how to get that comfortable again and hope to god that I haven't ruined everything by getting up.
  • And for the record, I did not make it back to that comfy spot. I hope it was worth it.

  • Jadon: Lavender town scares me so bad. I didn't sleep last night after reading stories about it.
  • Me: I like Lavender town...
  • Jadon: You like a town based around death, but are scared to death of Slenderman?
  • Me: There's something in human nature that makes you fear him...
  • Jadon: He doesn't do anything.
  • Me: That's what's so scary. Your mind comes up with things so much worse than anyone could've written out for his lore. If he had teeth then it'd be obvious he'd bite you. If he had claws he'd scratch you.
  • Jadon: He's got a suit. OH GOD HE'S GOING TO CHARGE YOU INTEREST!

  • Madison: Guys...it's snowing!
  • Me: Holy shit when did this happen? I never noticed!
  • Nathan: Oh really? I thought this was just ash falling from the sky. I always get the two confused.
  • Me: Snow used to fall from the sky, but everything changed when the fire nation attacked.

"Do you think there’s a dinosaur heaven?"

- Me trying to watch Armageddon with more issues with my attention span due to a concussion

"I’ll try to remember to do that tomorrow, but if I don’t, sorry. I can’t speak on behalf of my memory."

-

"Trust me, I’m a stoner"

-

Text

Friar Lawrence in the churchyard with a crowbar.

"How does oxygen get in water(H2O)?"

- One of the things I heard in my honors Bio class today.

"Cats aren’t mammals; They’re felines!"

- One of the things I heard in my honors Bio class today.